Thursday, September 01, 2005
Yesterday was supposed to be nostalgic and lovely but it wasn't.
It was the eve of Teacher's Day you see. I went back to Temasek and caught up with my secondary school friends. Even though we are all in different institutes and lead very different life now, somehow there is still this special bond :)) The strongest chemical bond. This started my day right and made everything nice. This event was suppose to set the pace for the day. Since it started off well, i thought it would end off well too but no. I was wrong.
Sick, tired, irritated !
Home was supposed to be a haven but its not.
I had fun with Kz at K box because this time round, we didn't get cheated muahahas. We were given the 10 seater room =XXxxxXXx. So its like super big !!!!!!!!! and there was only the both of us. That's like the whole room all to us :)) And yea as usual Kz and me were always up to lots of nonsense. Then we went to meet Hai and Dian. I miss Dian so much. =(( She's is still so huggable.
It was supposed to end right but it didn't why!!!!!!!!!!!
I always believed that you would be the last person to hurt me.
Went home and that's when everything started. Daddy was lying on the floor and his eyes were red. I didn't know what to do or how to react. I kept asking him if he was alright and he just replied plainly that he's fine. I know he's really exhausted due to the stress from work and granny's sickness. I guess it was the guilt in me that made me feel this way but i felt really bad for going out and stuff when i could have helped him to lighten the burden.
I hate feeling guilty.
Looking at his body lying down on the ground so inanimately makes me want to cry too. I kept asking if he was okay. That was all i could do. He didn't respond, he just closed his eyes. I wanted to cry, i felt pain but i didn't. I couldn't. The tears won't come. I stared blankly at the computer. I asked my little brother over to ask him to choose the colour he wants for his mp3 player and he started to fill me in on his day. Apparently he didn't go to the doctor when he was supposed to. He complaint about feeling sick and all but he chose to go out with his friend in the end. My parents wanted to see the mc but obviously he couldn't produce it. I was so irritated by his actions that i started to question him and he simply walked away.
This time round, i cried. I'm so fed up with my family.
I'm frustrated with my little brother. I love him so much but..
He doesn't know it. Everyone in the family loves him so much but he can't see it.
He screams at us, he says that we are biased. He says that we don't care for him.
He doesn't listen because if he did, he would have heard the sounds of our hearts breaking.
I just want to go home to the family i once loved, still love..
Today wasn't any better. I feel down in the dumps. Is it me ????
Sticky sick and tired.
Hmms maybe its because i haven't taken my bath =xXXXx
I miss you. When those tears fell, i wished you were there for me but..its just a wish
¶ 10:19 PM
It was the eve of Teacher's Day you see. I went back to Temasek and caught up with my secondary school friends. Even though we are all in different institutes and lead very different life now, somehow there is still this special bond :)) The strongest chemical bond. This started my day right and made everything nice. This event was suppose to set the pace for the day. Since it started off well, i thought it would end off well too but no. I was wrong.
Sick, tired, irritated !
Home was supposed to be a haven but its not.
I had fun with Kz at K box because this time round, we didn't get cheated muahahas. We were given the 10 seater room =XXxxxXXx. So its like super big !!!!!!!!! and there was only the both of us. That's like the whole room all to us :)) And yea as usual Kz and me were always up to lots of nonsense. Then we went to meet Hai and Dian. I miss Dian so much. =(( She's is still so huggable.
It was supposed to end right but it didn't why!!!!!!!!!!!
I always believed that you would be the last person to hurt me.
Went home and that's when everything started. Daddy was lying on the floor and his eyes were red. I didn't know what to do or how to react. I kept asking him if he was alright and he just replied plainly that he's fine. I know he's really exhausted due to the stress from work and granny's sickness. I guess it was the guilt in me that made me feel this way but i felt really bad for going out and stuff when i could have helped him to lighten the burden.
I hate feeling guilty.
Looking at his body lying down on the ground so inanimately makes me want to cry too. I kept asking if he was okay. That was all i could do. He didn't respond, he just closed his eyes. I wanted to cry, i felt pain but i didn't. I couldn't. The tears won't come. I stared blankly at the computer. I asked my little brother over to ask him to choose the colour he wants for his mp3 player and he started to fill me in on his day. Apparently he didn't go to the doctor when he was supposed to. He complaint about feeling sick and all but he chose to go out with his friend in the end. My parents wanted to see the mc but obviously he couldn't produce it. I was so irritated by his actions that i started to question him and he simply walked away.
This time round, i cried. I'm so fed up with my family.
I'm frustrated with my little brother. I love him so much but..
He doesn't know it. Everyone in the family loves him so much but he can't see it.
He screams at us, he says that we are biased. He says that we don't care for him.
He doesn't listen because if he did, he would have heard the sounds of our hearts breaking.
I just want to go home to the family i once loved, still love..
Today wasn't any better. I feel down in the dumps. Is it me ????
Sticky sick and tired.
Hmms maybe its because i haven't taken my bath =xXXXx
I miss you. When those tears fell, i wished you were there for me but..its just a wish
¶ 10:19 PM
