Friday, August 20, 2004
Initial
I always thought that one of my virtues would be patience ( and i'm proud of it ) but to my dismay, i realise that i'm losing my cool so easily these days.. Its to an extent that i become pissed at myself for shouting and snapping at the people around me..especially my parents..!! Like hello~ wake up girl, what is wrong with you..!!! i can feel the pressure forming around the barricades that i have build around my world to protect myself..to detach myself..i'm giving in to the pressure that is surrounding me..! The next thing i know..my eyes might just pop out!!
Depressing as it may be..i choose to believe that after whining and whining and whining..everything will fall into place..and things will be just fine ..-smilez- Oh well.. i don't have much of a choice, do i ? i can either a) find a victim to whine at or b) cry in a dark corner of the room with the insects or c) scream at everyone that crosses my path..Eventually i choose option a..as for the victim..it shall not be disclosed !
Basically..this blog started mainly due to the frustration i feeling now..and i need to vent it out ..or else..people will start suspecting its the time of the month again~ Another reason would be zhuang, cause he's the one who encouraged me to start blogging..and here i am :P..
I realised that there are some people in the world who never fails to hurt you over and over again..without knowing that they are doing so.. Fascinating isn't it..the person is totally oblivious to his actions and the impact that it has on the people around him.. i couldn't say anything..or rather i was speechless..He doesn't understand the importance he has in a person's life.. That instant when i realised that , it felt like someone had just injected anesthesia into me ..i can't feel anything initially..but gradually the pain sinks in..and it hurts big time ! This time round, the pain doesn't go away..it persists . Maybe one day he will discover what it feels like to hurt someone unknowing..maybe he will feel guilty..i don't know..the future is too unpredictable..but one thing is for sure..the pain has already been inflicted..it wouldn't go away. To that person..don't feel guilty..its not going to lessen the pain anyway ~ ( i sound sadistic, maybe its the night)
Made a self discovery about myself today, i can't take criticism !!! The incident is as follow: my mum was doing this target setting thing for herself..and she seek for my help to check her sentence structure..so i sat down in front of the computer..rather reluctantly...( i admit i was fatigue!! i just got home at 10.30 pm) and she started to comment that my sentence structure sounded wierd too..and i was starting to feel my blood boiling within me..Keep your cool girl..but before i knew it..i was raising my voice at her...!! =x..Thinking back..i feel guilty..but hey next time if you seek for someone's help..remember to be polite okay..you were the one who wanted help in the first place..so learn how to listen and learn..you can't learn while talking at the same time you know..~ mummy dear..i feel so hurt..you made me so frustrated but oh well..! Now my mummy is using her.." I'm never wrong" tone to make me log off..i shall be obedient =)..5 4 3 2 1..
Reflection : Before commenting on others..Take a very very close look at yourself..don't end up grieving someone's delicate soul !
¶ 11:09 PM
Depressing as it may be..i choose to believe that after whining and whining and whining..everything will fall into place..and things will be just fine ..-smilez- Oh well.. i don't have much of a choice, do i ? i can either a) find a victim to whine at or b) cry in a dark corner of the room with the insects or c) scream at everyone that crosses my path..Eventually i choose option a..as for the victim..it shall not be disclosed !
Basically..this blog started mainly due to the frustration i feeling now..and i need to vent it out ..or else..people will start suspecting its the time of the month again~ Another reason would be zhuang, cause he's the one who encouraged me to start blogging..and here i am :P..
I realised that there are some people in the world who never fails to hurt you over and over again..without knowing that they are doing so.. Fascinating isn't it..the person is totally oblivious to his actions and the impact that it has on the people around him.. i couldn't say anything..or rather i was speechless..He doesn't understand the importance he has in a person's life.. That instant when i realised that , it felt like someone had just injected anesthesia into me ..i can't feel anything initially..but gradually the pain sinks in..and it hurts big time ! This time round, the pain doesn't go away..it persists . Maybe one day he will discover what it feels like to hurt someone unknowing..maybe he will feel guilty..i don't know..the future is too unpredictable..but one thing is for sure..the pain has already been inflicted..it wouldn't go away. To that person..don't feel guilty..its not going to lessen the pain anyway ~ ( i sound sadistic, maybe its the night)
Made a self discovery about myself today, i can't take criticism !!! The incident is as follow: my mum was doing this target setting thing for herself..and she seek for my help to check her sentence structure..so i sat down in front of the computer..rather reluctantly...( i admit i was fatigue!! i just got home at 10.30 pm) and she started to comment that my sentence structure sounded wierd too..and i was starting to feel my blood boiling within me..Keep your cool girl..but before i knew it..i was raising my voice at her...!! =x..Thinking back..i feel guilty..but hey next time if you seek for someone's help..remember to be polite okay..you were the one who wanted help in the first place..so learn how to listen and learn..you can't learn while talking at the same time you know..~ mummy dear..i feel so hurt..you made me so frustrated but oh well..! Now my mummy is using her.." I'm never wrong" tone to make me log off..i shall be obedient =)..5 4 3 2 1..
Reflection : Before commenting on others..Take a very very close look at yourself..don't end up grieving someone's delicate soul !
¶ 11:09 PM
